Mom has been SO MUCH BETTER the last couple of days.  Yesterday we went shopping.  She became tired before we got home, but so was I.  On Friday when I pulled up to her house, she was standing out front working on trimming up a plant.  She looked so healthy and wonderful.  It made me happier than just about anything I can think of.  Also, this week we heard from Dr. Moore, her oncologist.  Her CA 125 level has come down to almost normal.  That is great news that means that the chemo is working.

So, life seems to be returning to normal or rather the new normal.  Right now my life consists of family and work - and I LOVE IT.  It has been so wonderful to simplify.  I know this is where the Lord has me and I feel great satisfaction here. 

I'm sure Mom will continue to have good days and bad days and none of us is promised tomorrow but today my renewed knowledge of that truth is a good thing.

Cancer=bad Family=good

Back at Mom and Dad's.  Dad and hubby had breakfast this morning and then Dad is running errands and this is day 4 after chemo round 2.  For those of you who are cancer illiterate, that means today is NO FUN.  Mom is in bed after waking up nauseous.  Thank God for anti-nausea medicine.  As Mom said a couple of days ago "you do this or you die", so it's worth it.

In happier news, I finished a project!  Okay, for those of you who know me, are you okay?  Did it hurt when you just fell over?  I hope you didn't actually pass out from the shock of that announcement.  Here is my first chemo hat.

I finished it while watching "Invictus" with my 17 year old last night.  Good movie.  Great kid.  I kind of love him.  He killed a gopher at Mom and Dad's yesterday.  It was part of an ongoing saga that included the gopher making holes and mounds all over their yard, an attempt at a humane trap that was merely a snack shop, and my dad sitting on the deck with a bb gun.  My non-hunting dad.  My college professor, nature loving dad.  

My son was over helping fix some sprinkler heads that were hard for Dad to reach 3 months after hip replacement surgery when the gopher showed his face - actually I think it was his rear end that was sticking up.  I won't give more details for those of you who are ASPCA inclined, but suffice it to say, they got the job done.  It needed to be done.   And now my son has a story to tell at school today.

Life Goes On

Today my daughter was in the Homecoming Parade!  That was fun.  My kids go to rival high schools in our medium size bedroom community.  Here's the best picture I could get of her float.  I have this new phone see . . . and I can't figure it out.  I pointed the camera STRAIGHT AT HER and pushed a button and the screen went BLACK!  I had to chase that float around a corner to get this:



Yesterday was my "big" work day.  I got home at 9 and started again at 8 this morning.  Tomorrow I will head out around 8 and get home around 6.  But Friday I get to spend the day with Mom at the infusion clinic (since Dad has a cold) and thats totally worth working for.    She had her blood work done today and if her blood levels are good, she can have chemo.  If not, she has to wait.   So we are praying . . .

I made this homemade chicken pot pie with pie crust maple leaves on it for dinner tonight.  It was YUMMY! and PRETTY!  and hubby and I ate almost all of it by ourselves. 

Short - really short - hair

We cut Mom's hair (off) last night.  She is still so pretty!  She went right in and put on a beautiful, brightly colored scarf and looked great.  It's a new look for my conservative, elegant mother but it's a good one. 

Then I came home and ate the most amazing candy covered apples from another wordpress blog.  You gotta read that recipe!  I'm pretty sure it's a few hundered calories of reading pleasure but it's SO WORTH IT! 

Earlier in the day I took a day "off" and cleaned my windows, did laundry, read some required reading for work, and BAKED.  It was heavenly and ended perfectly by sharing a yummy apple with my hubby! Sigh . . . 

Back to work today!

Your Hands

Peace in the Storm

I am back at Mom and Dad's while Dad is at a meeting.  It is so peaceful out here.  It always has been.  This is the house that we built in 1980.  The back bay window and glass door overlook a huge deck that Mom and Dad rebuilt and expanded on their own not that long ago.  The deck is a restaurant for birds and uninvited squirrels and overlooks a small lake to the west of the house.  The front door has a screen and it is the perfect temperature outside for having the windows open.  Neighbors have been mowing and birds are singing outside.  Friends have brought a delicious meal and I am embroidering while Mom sleeps. 

There is a quietness to this time that is rarified beauty.  I am blessed.  We are blessed.  God is good.  All the time.

Cancer Sucks (sorry for those that offends, but it does)

Today has been a bad day for Mom.  It's day 14 after chemo round 1.  She said her hair is starting to fall out but she's not ready to cut it yet.  She wasn't feeling great this morning and when I called tonight, Dad said she has had a rough day and was in bed.  I am worried about her and trying to tell myself that this is just what cancer is like.

I went over early this morning and she was up eating oatmeal (with raisins, just like I make it) and offered me some.  We sat and ate and I showed her some bargains I found this week (which she admired).  A few minutes later she told me she had just thrown up, took some anti nausea medicine, and went back to bed for a while.  I slept too.  When I woke up and checked on her she had also just awakened so we watched the PBS shows that we both love  the most (America's Test Kitchen and Oklahoma Gardening) and talked about how much we use the information from those two shows.  Then we went out on the deck and sorted daffodil bulbs, dipped them in fungicide and she sent them home with me.  I left around lunch time with some delicious roast, potatoes, carrots, and bread (extra food that people had brought to them) as well as a bag of daffodil bulbs for my garden. 

How did she do that?  How did I end up just talking to my Mom about my life like nothing was different and leaving with food and flowers when she is so sick?   I know that the answer is "because she's your Mom" but that answer doesn't change the feeling I have that I have been in the presence of Great Love today.   

I just feel really sad tonight that there's nothing I can do to make her better.  And nothing I can do to make her live forever.

"Her children rise up and call her blessed" Proverbs 31:28

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I'm thinking about heroes this morning and she is one of mine.